I was hanging-out with the ‘Heavily Tattooed’
Judi ‘Skulls’ Ramone…
in a bar just off [The Notorious] Union St.
We were afternoon Session-Drinking
and discussing Old School Punk & Oi!
… in between laughing hysterically
at each other’s [Serious] ‘Women Troubles’.
“Haha, you get the ‘Lookers’, Pauly
… who are alright for 5 minutes, like…
before turning into Obsessed Psychos,
who then Stalk your ass all over the City,
you are Hunted… just like the GBH song.”
“Yeah, but you get the ‘Sweethearts’
with ‘Unresolved Childhood Issues’
who just need lots of TLC and mothering
… before revealing their cruel, spoilt,
bratty sides… right after you’ve opened
that Big, Beautiful, Caring Heart of Yours.”
“Heehee, ‘tis true, indeed, fine sir…
‘Tiring’, innit… ya know, in another world
‘Me & You’ would work brilliant together.”
“You’ve drank too much… I’ve got a dick.”
“Oh yeah, there is that… Ok, I guess,
the bestest Partners-In-Grime-And-Crime,
we will remain then, mate… it’s your round!”

Paul Tristram is a widely published Welsh writer who deals in the Lowlife, Outsider, and Outlaw genres.  He wrote his first poem as a teenager following his release from the (Infamous) Borstal ‘HMP Portland’, and he has been creating Literary Terrorism ever since.  His novel ‘Crazy Like Emotion’ published by Close To The Bone Publishing is available to purchase right here Read other articles by Paul, or visit Paul's website.