Zoological Lexicon

(Part One)

biden (n.)– an Aristotelian zoon politikon, subsisting exclusively on the decaying remnants of political “spoils”

blair (n.)– a small parasite, which rides on, and feeds off of, the posteriors of its hosts

bush (n.)– a vicious bird-of-prey, especially dangerous for its sudden attacks and wanton cruelty

cheney (n.)– a secretive, subterranean creature which burrows into, and gradually destroys, all living things

clintonb (n.)– a spineless invertebrate: has wide-ranging nocturnal habits; classified as an “opportunistic omnivore”

obama (n.)– a species of “cyborg,” characterized by a human larynx connected to speech-writing machine

pence (n.)– a newly discovered creature: apparently lacks any distinctive characteristics or intelligent behaviors

trump (n.)– in Freudian/Haeckelian evolutionary theory, an archaic “survival” of indeterminate anthropoid origin; exclusively motivated by a conspicuously “primitive” and undifferentiated Id

William Manson is the author of The Psychodynamics of Culture (Greenwood Press). Read other articles by William.