Once upon a time on the island of Manhattan
In New York City, there was a most unusual
Animal hospital, and a strange animal hospital
It was, for, truth be told, it was a hospital that had
No animals in it; some said they simply vanished
Without trace, having all fled without even so
Much as a by-your-leave; a veterinary student,
Speaking on condition of anonymity, said that
They had grown weary of all the poking and
Prodding; a nurse in the parakeet department
Claimed that the patients had walked out in
Protest over a lack of gluten-free options, while
The assistant to the assistant to the assistant said
That the dean had been sowing his oats with one
Of the sows; whatever the case may be, having
An animal hospital without animals can prove
Nettlesome; imagine an animal hospital without
Any animals in it – whoever heard of such a thing?
Some would call this peculiar, while others would
Even call it preposterous; and so the hospital was
At risk of losing all their funding, along with their
Veterinary students who suddenly had no animals
With which to practice on; indeed, much hand-wringing
Ensued, until one fine day, someone came up with
The idea of using human patients on Medicaid instead