war, survival, guilt and choice

redemption starts in a dark nightmare

i can’t forget the light behind my eyes
not only when i sleep but, when i hide
inside, forgiveness bursts a fireworks
display of every choice i made to survive
and its cost in lives

not dying became a muscle memory
living a habit to survive
then a habit to forget
then a habit practiced
in a dark nightmare

tears exploding
i choose not to die
at anyone’s hand
not even mine
and step into the light
and cry: all i did
was to survive

Gregory Ross is a Viet Nam Veteran, a powerful negative impact in his life. Positively: he and his wife have been together for 42 years and have a 35 year old son and a 26 month old grandson. He worked Acupuncture Detox for 25 years, mostly in Highland Hospital, the county hospital of Oakland, Ca. Gregory has been published elsewhere. For more info or to comment on his writings in DV, email: Gregory Ross, gandgandg@yahoo.com Read other articles by Gregory.