Chickenhawks and Thieving Magpies!

Why do the U.S. voters choose,
Those Pols time after time;
The sort of guys you wouldn’t trust,
If you were bust with your last crust,
Or your last lousy Dime.

Dan Quayle was dafter than a brush,1
But clearly not too daft;
To join up with the National Guard,
And thus it wasn’t too damn hard,
To dodge the Vietnam Draft.

One more Draft dodger, ‘Dubya’ Bush2
The ‘Einstein’ of his day;
Who planned Iraq’s war with such flair,
Along with crony Tony Blair,
It wouldn’t go away!

Bill Clinton too escaped the Draft,
And fled to England’s shores,
And studied hard in Oxford town,
And kept his Democrat head down,
Away from U.S. wars.

At the White House in Washington,
Beneath the office desk;
And dressed in blue with a broad grin,
Knelt Monica Lewinsky in,
A scene from a burlesque!

Whilst in resuscitative mode,
She gave him mouth-to-mouth;3
A normal practice in First Aid,
But rumour has it treatment strayed,
In a direction south!

Next Richard Millhouse Nixon who,
Was known as ‘Tricky Dick’;
Then ‘Watergate’ caused quite a row
Expletives are deleted now,
But still he was a P…k!

And Nixon’s ‘President of Vice’
That Spiro Agnew guy,4
A crafty sly Republican,
Whose graft was as American,
As Mother’s apple pie!

Americans should recognise,
That those in the top posts,5
Buy power with their dollar bills,
But don’t solve any social ills,
In spite of all their boasts.

  1. On a school visit, Dan Quayle ‘corrected’ a student’s spelling of potato to ‘potatoe’. []
  2. Bush also avoided the Vietnam War by joining the National Guard. []
  3. Clinton claimed that he wasn’t engaging in sexual activity with Monica Lewinsky but she was with him. []
  4. Agnew ‘resigned’ because of bribes and tax-evasion. []
  5. Chickenhawks: Joe Biden; George W. Bush; Jed Bush; Dick Cheney; Bill Clinton; Newt Gingrich; Rudolf Giuliani; Richard Perle; Mitt Romney; Karl Rove; Arnold Schwarzenegger and Paul Wolfowitz. []
Richard is a poet and amateur blues harmonica player who lives in the seaside town of Clacton on England's east coast. He's had approximately 70 poems published in England and Wales as well as a number of articles. He can be reached at: richard-layton@zen.co.uk. Read other articles by Richard.