The official Web site for the week of gratitude recommends “choosing such a memorable and unique teacher gift that your effort shines through and your teacher has no choice but to realize how much you think of them.”

Doing her best to follow this advice, Seattle Public Schools Superintendent Maria Goodloe-Johnson gave us teachers a clear picture of what she thinks of us when she sent two personal gifts for the week, beginning with a hand-delivered letter sent certified mail at a cost of $5 per teacher — totaling some $20,000. The letter read in part:

The purpose of this letter is to advise you of my determination that there is probable cause to non-renew your contract that was for 180 basic contract days plus two LID (Learning Improvement Day) days, and offer to you an employment contract for the 2009-2010 school year for 180 basic days plus one LID day.

I checked with the foreign language department, and they translated the above passage as, “I used the contract you previously signed as tissue paper; your union and legal right to collectively bargain don’t impress me; and should you not agree to these terms, good luck.”

Remember when your mom gave you that handmade pair of boxer shorts with the Looney Tunes fabric at your 13th birthday party? Okay, maybe that was just me, but I can attest the feeling is analogous to receiving this letter from the District. It wasn’t that losing a day’s wages and the extra day of training to make us better teachers was so bad. It was the skirting of our union and the rigid ultimatum that left the taste of day-old school lunch in teachers’ mouths.

Just like when my mom wished she had saved the gifting of the Daffy Duck undershorts for a more discreet time after seeing the look of alarm on my face, District Spokeswoman Patti Spencer realized the inopportune timing of their petit cadeau, saying, “It’s very, very regrettable.”

The district’s hunger for generosity not yet satiated, Teacher Appreciation Week was capped off for me and some 172 other teachers in the Seattle School District with a second gift: messages to our principals that we were to be “RIFed.”

I checked again with the foreign language department, and RIF is roughly interpreted as “Reduction In Force” — or more precisely: “apply for unemployment; good luck raising your four-month-old son; oh, and your three-and-a-half years of service to the children of Seattle are irrelevant.”

Okay, so maybe it was a little tacky to deliver these gifts during Teacher Appreciation Week, but after all, the district is facing a budget shortfall that was exacerbated by Washington state legislators’ reckless slashing of $800 million from the K-12 budget, right?

I sympathized briefly with the District when I remembered the summer after college that I wanted to get my dad a really nice pocketknife for his birthday, but I was broke, so I got him a shirt with a picture of a Swiss Army knife instead.

However, the District’s claim of lack of funds is inexplicable given that they are hoarding more than $30 million in a reserve “rainy day” fund they say must be saved in case of a financial storm. It should be clear by now that we are in the middle of an economic monsoon that will wash the education of our children into the gutter if we don’t tap that fund.

Moreover, the District has another important source of revenue. Washington state law RCW 28A.320.320 allows school districts to transfer the interest earned on capital funds over to the operations budget, specifically to pay for “instructional supplies and equipment.”

In 2008-09, the district budgeted $22.7 million for “instructional supplies and equipment,” which, if transferred from the capital side would free up $22.7 million from operations. That money could then be used to offset the Reduction In Force of teachers and ballooning class sizes.

Advice columnist Linda Ann Nickerson has council for just such situations: “Gag gifts are one thing, but what if you get a gift that makes you gag? Resist the temptation to state that you hate the flavor, color or style of the gift . . . [But if] the item is the wrong size, or broken, then it may be acceptable to request the giver’s permission to return or exchange the item.”

Ever polite, Seattle’s teachers are now asking if we can exchange these broken gifts for ones that improve the quality of education in our city. Should we be ignored, we will take the discourteousness to mean that students, parents, and teachers should unite to build a civil rights struggle for the funding education deserves.

Like a note confiscated by the teacher and read aloud to the class, there can no longer be any doubt about the message being sent.

With the passage of the bailout bill for Wall Street, everyone now knows that the government can come up with a gazillion dollars (I’m not a math teacher, but I believe that is the approximate sum) to address a national problem if it’s deemed serious enough.

Being a social studies teacher, I’ll give you a simple quiz to assess your comprehension of the Wall Street giveaway. This means either:

A) Before this bailout, we haven’t had any serious problems in America that would require a massive spending initiative.

B) Government had the capacity all along to address any of the major crises in America with the needed funds, but has refused to do so.

Gottcha! This one’s a trick question — the answer actually depends on who’s taking the test.

If you are taking this test as you travel from the Cayman Islands to Wall Street in a personal Lear jet, one answer is appropriate.

The same answer applies to the politician taking the quiz while being chauffeured between fundraising dinners and appointments with lobbyists.

The answer is very different if the test is taken from the Ninth Ward in New Orleans; on the Interstate 35-W Bridge over the Mississippi River in Minneapolis; from a hospital bed at Walter Reed Army Medical Center; or in a classroom on Main Street.

The reality of the neglect of public schools in the United States is astonishing. The American Society of Civil Engineers gave the national school system infrastructure a “D” on its annual report card.

Overcrowded classrooms have cheated students from the individual attention they deserve. Teachers struggle to make ends meet, as the average increase in salaries nationally was 2.1 percent last year, while official inflation increased by more than 3.1 percent.

The solution to the problems in education, we have been told, is the same solution to everything else: “Let the free market rip.” Advocates for public schools have been lectured about improving education by introducing the business model. Privatize with charter schools and vouchers. Get rid of elected officials and bring in high-paid CEOs to run the schools.

Judging by the way corporate executives sabotaged their own system, I would rather see the student body president appointed to run the Department of Education.

With shrinking state budgets, school districts across the country, including Seattle, are asking their constituents to prepare for cuts in education spending.

The justification for starving schools because of diminishing funds may have slid by last month. Now, pleading poverty and other “dog ate my homework” kinds of excuses just won’t fly.

Total government spending (federal, state and local) on education in 2001 accounted for 4 percent of gross domestic product. The federal share of this spending, however, amounted to less than 8 percent of the total.

It’s clear that the federal government — Democrats and Republicans — have had other priorities.

In the world’s richest country, we now know there is no sum of money so big it cannot be raised if the problem is deemed important enough.

Our community says, “Money for Main Street Middle School, not for Wall Street!”