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(DV) Rajiva: How to Recognize a Liberal Feminist


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How to Recognize a Liberal Feminist
by Lila Rajiva
www.dissidentvoice.org
November 3, 2005

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You can recognize a liberal feminist by her favorite expression, ďItís not fair!Ē

Said in a tone that implies that everything else is mighty fair. 

Youíd never hear a radical feminist say that. Or a conservative feminist (and believe me, thereís such a thing).

Radicals and conservatives know that life isnít fair . . .  itís dark

Radical and conservative feminists have the same reasons for thinking exactly the opposite things.

Nobody knows what a liberalís reasons are. Not even a liberal. 

Radicals think women are naturally moral, so they should always do whatever they want.

Conservatives think women are naturally moral, so they should never do whatever they want. Radicals thinks sex is so great, women should have it as much as men; conservatives think itís so great, neither men nor women should have it.

Liberals donít have sex. They donít think itís fair.

Liberals prefer Hillary to Bill. They think sheís more masculine.

Conservatives prefer Laura Bush to Hillary. They think sheís more feminine.

Radical feminists prefer Dennis Kucinich to Hillary. They think heís more feminine.

You see, liberal feminists would all rather have been born men. They donít get why they should take time out to bear children and not be paid to do it.

Conservatives know that having children is so much fun you donít need to be paid for it.

Radicals know itís so much fun that men should get to do it too.

The reason why liberal feminists would rather be men is simple. They think men have all the power, and the laws give it to them.

Conservatives think that men have all the power, but God gives it to them.

Radical feminists also think that men have all the power, but they know that women give it to them.

Which is why liberals spend their time arguing the law, conservatives spend their time arguing about God, and radicals spend it arguing with other women.

Lila Rajiva is a free-lance writer in Baltimore and the author of The Language of Empire: Abu Ghraib and the US Media (Monthly Review Press, 2005). She can be reached at: lrajiva@hotmail.com. Copyright (c) 2005 by Lila Rajiva

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Other Articles by Lila Rajiva

* License to Bill: In India, Bill Gates Does Well by Doing Good
* The Burgh, Downsizing
* Preview of Abu Ghraib in New Orleans
* Leviathan in the Flood: Katrina and the Fishy Logic of the State
* The NPT is Dead.... And It's a Good Thing Too
* An 800-Pound Gorilla Goes to the UN
: John Bolton's New Internationalism
* Vision Mumbai Submerged: Water, Water, Everywhere, Nor Any Drop to Drink
* America's Downing Syndrome, or Why the Not-So-Secret Air War Stayed ďSecretĒ
* Turkey Supreme
* Witches and Bastards: An Imperial Wizard and a Prescription for Anti-Imperialism
* Playing Monopoly in Charm City
* The Phariseeís Fire Sermon
* The Ideology of American Empire
* Tsunami Cover Up? NOAA and the Flood
* Iraqi Women and Torture, Part IV: Gendered Propaganda, the Propaganda of Gender
* Iraqi Women and Torture, Part III: Violence and Virtual Violence
* Iraqi Women and Torture, Part II: Theater That Educates, News That Propagandizes
* Iraqi Women and Torture, Part I: Rapes and Rumors of Rape
* Nicholas Kristof's Fox Pas(s)
* Putting Conservatives on the Couch: Transactional Analysis and the Torture Apologists
* The New Post-Colonial Racism
* Eyeless in Iraq: The L.A. Times and the Fog of War

 

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