Report to the UN Security Council:
The
Growing Martian Threat
by
Tom Gorman
Dissident Voice
March 13, 2003
There's
an emerging crisis that I feel I must bring to the attention of the UN Security
Council. There is a planet that is at times only thirty million miles from the
Earth. It is called Mars (chillingly, the same name as the Roman god of war).
In the past, pieces of Mars have broken off (allegedly during collisions with
meteors), and that debris has subsequently struck the Earth. The only response
that the Earth has made to these unprovoked attacks is to send a few peaceful
space machines to "gather information." And even two of these craft,
the Mars Climate Orbiter and the Mars Polar Lander--both scheduled for
"peace landings" on the "Red" planet in late 1999 -- were
never heard from again.
Now there will be those
detractors (mostly in the liberal media) who say that there is no evidence that
any life, much less intelligent life, exists on Mars, and that even if it did,
there is no evidence that such Martians would attacks us, or that they would
even be so equipped.
I would ask those people to
look at this satellite image of the planet Mars. [see attachment] Notice that
we cannot see below the surface of the planet. It is impossible to know what
the Martians are planning or constructing in their underground lairs. Also
notice the prominent ice caps. As we all know, water is the main precursor to
all biological weapons. Experts in extraterrestrial weapons systems tell us
that the ruddy complexion of Mars is due to its high iron content. This iron
can be made in to steel for the production of everything from small weapons, to
medium-sized weapons, to very large weapons. In short, I do not think we can
wait and see what the crafty and inscrutable Martians are planning for their
next attack on us.
Past actions are a fair
prediction of present intentions. Mars has had over three years to account for
the two missing Earth probes, and longer than that to reveal any and all
weapons of mass destruction, lack of evidence of which only further proves
their existence. Yet there has been absolutely no communication from the planet
Mars.
Now, I know that the economy
is in the toilet, but I call on the Security Council to lead a coalition of the
willing to neutralize and disarm the Martians. The cost of this space fleet
will be, if you'll pardon the pun, astronomical, but I must seriously caution
the "rationality-huggers" out there. A strike against a perceived
threat that has no basis in reality or logic may seem an incredibly foolish venture,
but I would argue that the price of doing nothing is far, far greater than the
price of acting. Unless the Security Council does not busy itself with the
crucial, rational, and inherently moral work of Martian disarmament, it does so
at the peril of becoming irrelevant.
Tom Gorman is the president of The Antiwar
Coalition at California State University, Los Angeles. He welcomes comments at tgorman222@hotmail.com (Martian
appeasers need not respond).