Hot Babe Wanted — immediately!
An evil genie trapped me in this lamp around 3000 years ago, in Baghdad (it was a real happening city — then). I’m allowed out on week-ends and ancient hollidays nobody remembers or celebrates except other 3000-year-old genies.
But I can’t leave Baghdad, which is kind of a mess right now. If it weren’t for the wireless net-book some harem-girl slipped me when our mean old Master was out bowling with his He-man Women-haters Club (friendly match against some CIA/Mossad buddies), I’d hardly get to speak to anyone at all.
I gotta get out of here. Freedom is indeed within reach, which is why I’m on this site.
I need a hot, horny, sexy woman to rub my…lamp.
All you gotta do is rub it the right way, yeah, that’s it, a little harder…and POOF! I shoot from the lamp in a creamy cloud of pearl-white smoke.
Once this is done, your wish is my command.
I can arrange for the lamp, with me inside it, to be shipped to your location — free of charge.
But, assuming you rub it real nice and I come — to you, what three wishes would you ask me to grant?
Anything you desire. I’ll just need your credit-card info to… uh… verify that you’re, you know, old enough to sign off on international packages. You know? Really.
I’m so, so, so alone. And I’ve always been jealous of your freedoms.